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    But James also hates my dad, so anytime he tries to have some authority, he lashes out saying how he hates everyone and storms off, leaving his mom in tears and I hate seeing her that way.

    But James also has a habit of leaving the house and doing things he shouldn't be doing and leaving me to cover for him, which I'm not gonna do cuz he's wrong.

    So when my dad asks where he is or anything, I tell him. And James thinks I'm a snitch, which I guess he was right, and gets angry with me and will hurt me in some way.

    He has hit me before and pushed me down but never anything like this before. So my step mom and my dad went out last night on a date, that's their thing is to go out on Saturdays and left me and James home alone.

    James is grounded so he couldn't have people over or go anywhere and I'm 14 so I can't go out at night anyways. It was about and I was watching a movie and minding my own business when the doorbell rings.

    And immediately I was thinking that James had invited someone over when he wasn't supposed to. And I was right but when I went to look out of the peephole, it was a boy from school that I like.

    James and I go to the same school, so I was guessing they were friends. James let him in and they headed to his room, but he gave me a look saying not to snitch.

    This was the guy that I liked so of course this time I wouldn't. James is a junior and so is this boy, Derek, who knows me cuz we used to have swim class together.

    He nodded at me and kept on going. And I was in my Minnie mouse jammies so I went to go change into something more age appropriate cuz Derek was there.

    I changed into a simple t shirt and shorts and I brushed my hair a bit, that was all, I wasn't trying to be flashy or anything, I just wanted to not look 6.

    The boys were upstairs doing whatever but then I heard footsteps above me, which you would think is insignificant, but my room is right above the family room, and the floor boards creak when someone's in there.

    So I feaked out cuz my room is a hot mess and I didn't want Derek to see it. So I run upstairs and James is rifling through my stuff and finds my journal and starts reading through the marked pages cuz I organize things based on what they're about.

    So he starts reading things about Derek and I start dying inside cuz I really don't want him to know. And I start trying to take it and shut him up and Derek is just cracking up about it.

    And then he puts it down and I start crying and running for the phone to call my dad and he stops me, grabbing me and holding me down saying that he was just kidding and that he's sick of my crap about him.

    And Derek says that its flattering and all that and is like so you really wanna get freaky with me and all that and it was written in my journal but I didn't mean it!

    And I said no, I was just kidding and all that and Derek says aww this too bad cuz I would have been into it and he was saying how sexy I am and how mature I am for my age.

    And James said that despite my being physically mature, I act like a little bitch and I was gonna learn to stop. And I was like get away from me, get out of my room and that was when Derek was like well you want me don't you and don't you realize how great being with an 11th grader would be.

    And I was saying no and James put his hands over my mouth and Derek came on top of me and was grabbing me and touching me everywhere and I was so scared.

    And James was saying that I was gonna learn to stop being a bitch and that I was gonna learn my place and Derek was saying how we were gonna have such a good time and they started pulling my clothes and things and I was saying no and trying so hard to escape but James hit me and was telling me to shut up and I was crying an begging him to stop but they both just kept going and they took turns until they came and I came when during Derek's turn and I didn't mean to and I didn't like it at all and I feel so dirty.

    When they finished they told me to go wash up and James said that if I said anything about it to my dad then he would do something else to me but he wouldn't be so merciful as he was claiming to be.

    And Derek went home afterwards and saud he looks forward to doing it again. And I was in the bath for an hour but couldnt scrub the dirtiness off of me and I just don't know what to do.

    I can't tell anyone anything and I'm scared that James will do something like this again and I don't know what to do. Please help me. My dad and I went to church this afternoon for his evening service bc he is our head pastor and we had a dinner service afterwards.

    We have our own designated spot to sit because were the pastors family. But my step mom didnt come today cuz she had a shift at work and my stepbrother never wants to come.

    So we were sitting away from everyone alone and I thought that this was my only chance to tell him, i just didn't know how to start the conversation.

    But one if the mothers of NY church called him over and it gave me the cha ce to say something. Don't hide behind your own walls and expect your spouse to come offering forgiveness.

    When you do wrong, humble yourself before your spouse and apologize. Own it. You demand that your spouse forgive you.

    God offers you and me forgiveness as a gift. Forgiveness is always a gift; it's not something you can demand. Forgiveness that is demanded is not forgiveness.

    Your spouse may say "I forgive you" under duress, but that only leads to higher walls and a closed heart. The only possibility of a restored relationship is to allow your spouse to offer the gift of forgiveness as and when they choose.

    You minimize the pain you caused your spouse. It's likely your spouse will need to express their hurt in various ways. You may not understand how they could feel as hurt as they do, or believe they should be "over it" already.

    Your spouse hurts as bad as they hurt. You can greatly facilitate healing your relationship by allowing your spouse to express their hurt as often as they need to, even though doing so is terribly uncomfortable for you.

    You try to control your spouse's forgiveness process. Trying to tell your spouse how and when to forgive you only adds to their pain.

    Your spouse may need some prolonged private time with God. They may need to talk about their hurt with you. They may need to talk about it with someone else.

    Even after extending you their forgiveness, they may have healing to do. It takes as long as it takes, and you can't control their process.

    You make excuses for your bad behavior. Any apology followed by a "but" is not a true apology. The point is not how tired you were, what you learned as a child, who else treated you badly, what you thought was going on, what your spouse did or didn't do, or anything else.

    Understanding those things may help you learn how not to repeat the hurtful behavior in the future, but an apology is not the time for rationalization.

    Even if you were only 1 percent at "fault", you need to apologize for the pain you caused without excuses.

    You point out your spouse's shortcomings. It's just another excuse. While your spouse may well have hurt you also, this is the time to focus on how you caused your spouse pain.

    And this goes for when your spouse needs to talk about their hurt feelings again. The spotlight can be turned the other direction another time see next week's article.

    For now, the pain you caused your spouse is what matters. You pretend everything is OK. The wound s you've caused your spouse don't immediately go away simply because you apologize and they say, "I forgive you.

    Friends still heard the negative things you said about your spouse. Your spouse still knows of your unfaithfulness.

    Their heart still hears the hurtful things you said. The consequences of your behavior may take time to deal with, sometimes a lot of time.

    You refuse to engage in rebuilding trust. Getting wounded destroys your spouse's ability to trust you, to either a small or large degree. The deeper the wound, the longer and harder it will be to rebuild trust.

    Again, it takes as long as it takes. Your role is to understand what "trustworthy" means to your spouse, and to do what it takes to live up to that—over and over and over again.

    You use Scripture as a weapon. Few things will turn your spouse off faster, raise their defenses and hamper their forgiveness process more than you wielding Scripture as a weapon over them.

    Telling your spouse "the Bible says you're supposed to forgive me" means you've got something else to apologize for—and change.

    You refuse to change your behavior. Even if your spouse says "I forgive you," what your relationship looks like in the future will depend on your actions going forward more than your words.

    You must change the behavior that wounded your spouse. It doesn't matter whether you think it's fair or not. You won't do it perfectly, but your spouse will need to see you changing.

    And this is where you need God's forgiveness and transforming power more than anything else.

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    Does this sound impossible? Humanly speaking, it is. That's why the only ones who can truly receive or offer forgiveness are those who have embraced the overwhelming gift of God's forgiveness of them.

    Your turn: How have you made it harder for your spouse to forgive you for the hurts you've caused? What are you going to do about it? Leave a comment below.

    As an author and speaker, she loves helping people discover the Fully Alive kind of life Jesus came to bring us. Visit her website at drcarolministries.

    This article originally appeared at drcarolministries. Great Resources to help you excel in ! Prayer helps you overcome anything life throws at you.

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    It is tough because you have spent 5 months with him but you need to make the determination if you want to be like this with him for the next 5 months because nothing will change unless he wants it to change.

    This is not fair to you. Sometimes in a relationship we can like the person but our personalities clash. A relationship like this can't have a future.

    I told my friend and it was a guy, I already treat that guy like my brother and worst thing is I just know that my boyfriend hate that guy who I call as my bro.

    He is mad at me because I told that guy how our relationship start and told him about my changing personality to that guy. I just want a consider from that guy and suddenly that guy tells my boyfriend about what we talk about and my boyfriend is very angry at me and until now he treat me like nothing..

    I have tried: I already asked him for apologies, already told the truth by talking to each other but it seems my boyfriend doesn't accept It..

    I think it was caused by: Because I chatting with that guy who he hates the most. I just know he hates that guy, I call as brother and now I already lost contact with that guy and deleted his contact and blocked him in social media.

    He did not like your male friend. Guys see male friends as threats to their relationship and your discussions with your friend confirmed to him that you have crossed boundaries.

    You have apologized and blocked your friend from contacting you so the only thing you can do now is allow your boyfriend time to process what happened.

    Now, after 2 years of being single, decided to give someone a chance, and I have 4 months with my boyfriend, and he has made me feel happy.

    After an argument that was initiated by my insecurities and my doubts I unfortunately compared him to my past, and I dearly regret it since he IS one in a million.

    He has made small talk and gives me dry responses. Will he ever forgive me and my ideal that every guy is the same, when they are not? It is about me not forgetting my past and not seeing the great man he is.

    I have tried: I've tried to apologize in so many ways. Make up brunch date, Texts, calls. I don't know what to do anymore.

    I think it was caused by: Me, I'm responsible for all this. I feel horrible. If you have problems with any of the steps in this article, please ask a question for more help, or post in the comments section below.

    Categories : Relationships. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 20, times. Lover of all things vintage and holistic healing.

    Log In via Login Sign Up. Home Articles Community My Profile. Article Edit Discuss. Home Relationships.

    I hurt my boyfriend. He is very sensitive,stubborn and doesn't forgive if I hurt him. He takes lots of time to come back to normal.

    I hurt him and now he doesn't take my calls nor replies to my messages. I keep asking him for forgiveness, but he doesn't reply. Read More: Click here to read the full article Please help me.

    My dad and I went to church this afternoon for his evening service bc he is our head pastor and we had a dinner service afterwards.

    We have our own designated spot to sit because were the pastors family. But my step mom didnt come today cuz she had a shift at work and my stepbrother never wants to come.

    So we were sitting away from everyone alone and I thought that this was my only chance to tell him, i just didn't know how to start the conversation.

    But one if the mothers of NY church called him over and it gave me the cha ce to say something. So I got my phone out and pulled up this post and showed it to him when he say back down and I was in tears at that point and he said plainly, get up we're going.

    So he said goodbye to everyone and asked them to pray for us and we left straight for home. James and my step mom were sitting watching TV and my walked in and was livid.

    He immediately was screaming asking if he had violated me and what had he done and all that and do you know what the loser had to say?

    He said that I tried o seduce him and that I was always fantasizing about him and that I was forcing myself on him which is so untrue.

    And his mom then lost it screaming what had he done and that she was so disappointed in him and I was silently crying the whole time. My dad didn't even care that I liked this boy and had thought about him this way either, and he had me screenshot this and send it to him and my dad called the police and my step mom bought me to the doctors office for testing and all that and they don't know anything.

    And at the police station, they were questioning me and they took James in and Derek showed up in handcuffs and they're both being questioned.

    I was telling them what happened and I started crying again and I felt dumb cuz I can't stop crying and they were just asking me what I've already had to say 2 times and its just so hard.

    They went back to my house to get my clothes, which I wore yesterday and they tore my shorts and T-shirt and they were taking pictures of my body, my sides where they were hitting me and my face where Im starting to get a really dark bruise where James hit me.

    And Derek's family cane over to us and was apologizing and the police were saying how they think they have enough evidence to arrest him but if not, then I have to leave and stay at someone else's house so my dad and I might be getting a hotel.

    But they said my dad and I could leave but he wouldn't leave my step mom, who is distraught, and was crying the whole time.

    So we all left together to go back home, and my step mom called James dad who apparently lives in the state and is on his way. And I was just sitting in the tub again, crying and trying to wash it off but its not working and I just hope that they keep then away from me forever.

    My dad and I officially are pressing charges so I can get some closure and put James and Derek being bars so ig that's a start. My parents are looking for lawyers and therapists and they think we have enough evidence to put them away for a while.

    I'm not going back to school till friday but I still feel like everyone will have their judging and angry eyes on me and call me a liar and attention seeking.

    And I feel like God is angry with me for letting them take away my virginity which I was always taught to preserve for marriage. Everyone says it wasn't my fault but I can't help but feel like I should have fought harder to get away and that God was testing me and I failed.

    I'll never be the good and pure child of God I was before and that's what feels the worst about all of this.

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